As some of you may or may not know I have two beautiful children. I have a gorgeous daughter who is 8 and a wonderful son who is 10. You may also be aware that my son has autism. It is not too severe, he is communicative and I thank God every day that he is. But he still has his problems, and as we are a family his problems become our problems.
So why am I a bad mother? Because I think sometimes I a make his problems worse. I get distracted and tired and angry and frustrated and anxious and sad. And all of these emotions, when coupled with my sons problems mean that I do things for an easy life that I shouldn’t.
Today the kids are going on a school trip to the theatre to watch Shakespeare for Kids – Romeo and Juliette. They came home with a letter saying they could take a drink (non-fizzy) and a packet of sweets with them. Now, I was pretty good with the drink, they both chose a bottle of flat Vimto. But the sweets caused a huge problem. My gorgeous daughter dutifully chose a nice reasonable sized packet of strawberry shoe laces. Not to big and not too small. Job done. But my son point blank refused to look at any of the small sweets and was instead fixed immovably in front of the huge packets that you share as a family in front of the TV. For ten minutes I tried to persuade and cajole him into going for something along the size of his sisters packet. He was not budging. Then he started with the tears. When they arrive you know the next step is going to be him flinging himself on the floor and rolling around making silly noises. I just couldn’t face it at half past 8 in the morning in the local Spar. So I gave in. The cardinal sin. I let him chose a big bag of Tangfastics. And how did I justify this lack of parenting skills? I told him he had to share them with his sister. Bah, like that is gonna happen.
Chip, chip, chip he goes at my authority…..